Negative Self Talk

One thing that I hear fairly frequently from people I know is “you’re too hard on yourself” and I’d like to say that they’re crazy, but- I know that it is true.

They say that you are your own worst critic, and I know that I am mine.

On the one hand, being ‘hard’ on myself makes me strive for more, be more than I thought I could be… It has ensured fitness, academic, personal and professional successes that I might not otherwise have had if I wasn’t so driven.

On the other hand, it results in a lot of negative self talk.

“You look so good!”

Sadly my reply is “Thanks, but I feel so soft and out of shape lately. I was having a hard time workout out for the past few months.”

Excuses.

Wow, your back is looking really muscular.

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“Thanks but are you sure those aren’t fat rolls?” (I’m kind of ashamed to even admit that was my response because once I saw a photo of it I was like woah)

I’m beginning to realize that it is a really bad habit.  It spills over into other areas of my life. Focussing on the bad instead of the good. Pushing to do more, be better, instead of valuing what I have, what I’ve done, how far I’ve come. Focussing on the things that I’m unhappy about. Focussing on the things that need work instead of things that I am grateful for.

This morning, for my entire workout I was thinking about how I don’t really like TRX, and mentally planning a purchase of some dumbells, a small barbell and a bench. Why can’t I turn that thought around? TRX may not be my favourite, but it is an awesome workout. It is bringing my muscles back (yay!). I own one (um well actually two) already and have a perfect setup to use them. I can get a full body workout plus cardio and see results using this equipment. Why am I harping on the negative?

So, in my 21 days fashion, I am going to spend the next 21 days working on my inner dialogue. Focussing on the awesome. Ignoring the bad. I’m going to do this with my professional life, my personal life, my health and fitness efforts. Oh an also on general household stuff like not freaking out when my floors are full of dog hairs and the dishes aren’t done, but instead congratulating myself for getting in my workouts and eating healthy foods (we can’t have it all, right?).

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I’m curious about how this change is going to affect my life. I know this will be a challenge of epic proportions and I doubt I’ll be able to succeed  but I am going to give this one my best efforts.  I need the mental break. I need to be kind to myself. I need to treat myself with the same kindness I give to others.

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